I just learned something from a new writer friend that really blew me away. She had a horrible tragedy in her life a few years ago and instead of hiding under a rock, she started writing. Not dark, painful stuff, but comedy. The human spirit is an amazing thing. So that got me thinking. (sound like Carrie Bradshaw?) Why do some people get bogged down in grief for years after such an event, while others, after a period of mourning, bounce back higher than they knew they could?
Is there some innate mechanism that determines who will be happy and who will be sad? I've always had a theory that nature plays into temperament more than nurture. I've seen it lots of times. Some folks will always be unhappy, no matter what wonderful things happen to them. Others are like Teflon, letting bad stuff bounce away. Sure, they're sad sometimes, but they know how to move past it.
Now, I don't know this woman in person. We used to write for the same publisher. I can tell from her emails that she is fun, effervescent and upbeat. But I take my hat off to her. She's one of those rare human beings who will always make lemonade out of any lemons thrown at her.
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Rantings and Ravings by Dara Edmondson, Contemporary Romance Author
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7 comments:
I've always wondered about this too. By nature I'd say I'm a happy person. When something gets me down, I like to surround myself with things that make me happy.
But I have friends who are complete opposites. If something isn't wrong, there's no countering it. They will even take measures to increase their woe.
But in the end I always wonder if it's not that some people are simply happy not being happy. I have no idea.
I do agree that it seems to be more of a nature issue than nurture.
*I thought I should note... When Is adi some people are happy not being happy. I meant SOME. Certainly not all people who are unhappy are happy being that way!
Great topic. I've wondered the same thing myself.
That is an amazing gift and people like that deserve success.
I always thought that if some really, really terrible thing happened to me it would crush me and kill my ability to enjoy life, and to write, altogether...
But a few years ago, something bad did happen... and though it knocked me for six for a while, after the first shock I did find it possible to be cheerful and enjoy life and get on with the job... which is a huge surprise to me, because I've always thought of myself as a bit of a pessimist!
Human nature is a strange thing sometimes...
Have to add... wonderful friends made a *huge, huge* difference to my ability to see life in a positive way.
Lots of interesting comments on this post. Can't explain how impressed I was with this lady and I wondered if I'd have been able to turn my grief into something positive, as she has. Honestly, I think I eventually would because I'm basically a happy person. I used to work with a lady who always seemed depressed over other people's misfortunes - took them as her own. I finally realized she was perpetually miserable and that was her prevailing mood. I think God that's not me.
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